Wednesday nights is our "Peasant Princess" nights. It's a sermon series from Mark Driscoll based on the Song of Solomon about marriage, relationships and sex. We have been enjoying doing this series again for a second time...I think we're more open and aware of it this time round.
So anyways, last nights episode was regarding forgiveness and reconciliation. Listening last night I had an epiphany. I'm not good at forgiving, I'm not good at forgetting and I'm not good at moving on. I'm a sinner. I am not treating my spouse the way God treats us. I am sinning, everyday...and I don't know how to stop this. All my life I have never been good at "fighting", not physically, but I guess "emotional fighting". I take great offence, I get emotional, I take this personally BIG time! I also let past events cause me pain, grief, anxiety, etc...
So in our marriage, I came to the realization that we've never "completed" a fight. We've never had forgiveness and reconciliation. Our fights just keep piling up into one big fight and we're always emotionally making the other person pay for our past. This is not right. This is terrible. But my question is...how do I forgive and forget? Honestly, I don't know. I wish there was a clear cut answer, follow this 3 step process and you'll learn to forgive!
I am seeking counsel from another married couple that has been married for 20 years and I feel have a great marriage and advice.
So anyways, this was why I didn't post/finish Day 6. I am still doing the Love Dare, it's always in my thoughts. But yesterday, this took precedence. Talking about this to my husband took priority and I think that's okay!!!
So here's hoping tomorrow I can start back up and keep going the Love Dare.
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